Jim Parham, PR Chronicle

During the past several weeks, I’ve often been asked what I would’ve done differently for BP’s public relations efforts.

Honestly, I would not wish that responsibility upon anyone. It’s a daunting task and the odds are stacked against BP more than any craps table I’ve ever played.

But, for the record, here’s what I will say, retroactively — which isn’t really fair.

1. BP failed to manage the expectations from the onset. There was too much optimism, too much hyperbole and very few specifics. BP surely knew just how bad things could get and should have come out swinging with, “This may become the worst natural disaster in U.S. history.” That would’ve caught a lot more attention from Washington and the world.

2. Keep your CEO off the podium. There was no real reason to put him out there. He’s not a deep-sea drilling expert and not that adept at media relations.

3. Bring the U.S. government into the fold quickly as a partner. Might as well spread the wealth and have everyone take a little heat.

4. Put Louisiana and other Gulf state senior-level government officials on a BP disaster steering committee to oversee the response. Show teamwork, and that has simply not happened.

5. Engage volunteers and fishing captains quickly and extensively. While a lot more of this is happening now, their involvement sputtered at the start.

6. Bring environmental organizations into the mix early. The Sierra Club, National Wildlife Federation and others could have been a much bigger help early on.

7. Don’t speak with mixed messages or inconsistent messaging. This really goes back to the basics in crisis management.

8. Never turn on a deep-sea HD camera. From a PR perspective, this has become the “visual” for the media and it’s not a pretty sight.

9. Don’t go to yacht races when the chips are down. This speaks for itself.

10. Help your gas stations early, before they start complaining. It was evident early on that a boycott would ensue. Why not avoid this public display of dissatisfaction from station owners entirely?

Looking back is so much easier than looking forward.

The PR prospects for BP seem as black as the millions of gallons of oil spewing forth from their damaged and defunct well.

This hopeless scenario begs a question: Is there a catastrophe so horrific and reputation damaging that no matter how much PR you do, nothing will help?

BP seems to be answering this question with a resounding YES.

Sure, we can Monday morning quarterback this all we want, but we’re not in the cockpit of the PR machine. With finger pointing reaching a malaria-like fever pitch, what we really have here is the perfect storm of bad decisions, bad breaks and the violation of several crisis PR principles.

It’s pretty simple from the sidelines. First, never set up expectations that you cannot deliver. In the early stages of this debacle, day after day, BP laid out optimistic scenarios and failed to deliver on most of them.

I tell construction companies wanting to announce the opening of a building or a road to never use a hard and firm date. Instead of Aug. 12, let’s say, late summer. BP has plowed through every one of its artificial deadlines like a drunk behind the wheel of a semi with a blood alcohol level of 0.25 percent.

Then, it was the power struggle. Who is on first, BP, or the White House? Early on it appeared the government wanted to distance itself from the technological stuff by issuing stiff warnings to BP to get the situation under control, and fast.

What next comes into play obviously appears to be motivated by polling numbers. The White House slowly realized it was being blamed for a hands-off policy and the perception it was too removed from the problem. In response, it went into Alexander Haig mode, God rest his soul. “I’m in charge,” stated the president. Good move. But, a little late, and weeks after the Louisiana governor made political hay by giving a Katrina-like plea that appeared to be unheeded.

Whatever the outcome of the man-made disaster, there will be a lot of PR practitioners writing about this for decades to come. Someone hand me a Tylenol, please.

Ah, spring! It’s a time of renewal and restoration filled with flowers, sunny days and budding trees. However, it also can be a time of frustration, apathy and defeatism if you are a senior in college trying to get your first public relations job in this tough recession.

Nonetheless, I remain the eternal optimist and truly believe that hard work and a stick-to-it attitude can pay big dividends. The early bird gets the worm? How about the aggressive and savvy student gets the job?

Here are a few tips I provide to my students at IU about job searches, resumes, cover letters and interviews. It’s not rocket science, just a few common-sense rules that may help you.

1. I would strongly suggest there are NO RULES when it comes to job searches, resumes, cover letters and interviews. An unorthodox approach may be the exact way to garner attention of would-be employers.
2. There is no truth to the rule that a one-page resume is mandatory. On the contrary, please take enough space to “tell your story.” Tell them why you will be an asset, not an ass, as an employee.
3. Highlight your coursework that is applicable to a particular job or interview. C’mon now, customizing your resume in Word ® is so very, very easy.
4. Make sure you provide an up-to-date phone number and address on your resume as contact information for employers. Don’t make it hard to be found.
5. Don’t overdo the adjectives in describing your job at the Tastee-Freez. Managed a top performing team of two in the dispensing of frozen concoctions is a bit overblown.
6. Ask smart questions in the interview. They will be impressed if you ask tough questions. We know one great question is, “As a potential employee, how will you judge my success?”
7. Take innovative approaches to telling your story. How about spending $20 and assembling your very own Web site? This can be a place to store portfolio materials, tell a bit about your personal interests, etc.
8. Check and make sure your references will give employers fair, accurate and detailed information. Its amazing how many references, when called, are not exactly overflowing with great accolades on the student. Just be careful who you list.
9. Try at all costs to avoid “just” simply submitting a resume online to a nebulous, no-named e-mail box. Chances are it will fall to the wayside and not be culled from the thousands they receive. Remember the “no rules” axiom in point one. Instead, find someone in the organization and send your resume directly to them.
10. Write a cover letter that talks about them not you. Everybody likes to read about themselves. The same goes for company leadership.

I’ve spent the past seven weeks traveling the friendly skies. My weekly jaunts to the West Coast from southern Indiana have put close to 25,000 miles under my seatbelt.

As this is a public relations blog, meant to extol the virtues and pitfalls of our profession, it makes sense that I discuss the current state of public relations from a 30,000-foot-view, literally.

Let me state my own opinion here, as though it was germane to the travel industry, or as though anyone would care what I think.

Our nation’s airlines have become glorified Greyhounds with wings and big, noisy engines. Take for example my recent adventures at the Denver airport. It’s a fancy place with a terminal that is designed to look like the Rockies. It does a pretty good job of that.

But below ground, sitting under the well polished and glass-lined hallways, exists a den of despair. It’s simply a ground level, narrow corridor lined with regional jet gates as numerous as corn kernels on a cob.

It’s a noisy, cramped area that seems to have only one restroom for the thousands of passengers in transit and less amenities than my grandparents’ outhouse.

But we, as a thrifty-minded public, want cheap airfares and expect a lot for little. And, my friend, this has caused the steady decline of the quality of air travel.

Let me illustrate the “flight” from quality to quantity in air travel with my recent Continental Airlines experience. I was flying from Indianapolis to Seattle. I registered 24-hours in advance to get an exit row because it offers more leg room.

Upon sitting down, I realized this seat had the immobile and extremely tight armrests that don’t move and further reduce seat size. That’s my bad.

But, once airborne, a very portly man quickly moved from a seat behind me to sit in the middle seat. He said, “Hey, don’t mind if I sit here do ya?” I thought “He’s got a better seat, so why would he want to move up here?”

Soon, I learned the answer. “I’m sorry to butt-in on you like this, but I have an eight-page criminal justice paper due tomorrow and I’m too fat to see my computer screen in my assigned seat,” he proudly stated.

I have a theory about airline travel. It’s not been tested, but I like to think it’s true. When things start going bad, they get worse. In other words, the Dominoes do fall in a row.

Oh, did I mention he had a shirt that said, “Fight Crime, Shoot First.” It’s true. This seemingly simple matter, him taking up a lot of space in a too-small row, started the move toward critical mass and meltdown.

First, the fight attendant started her service cart down the isle and dumped several warm and flavorful hot dogs on me. I can see the fuel rods being pulled now.

Next, I bought the $3 pair of headphones for the video screen, but my arm-rest port was out-of-order and would not work.

Finally, the flight was landing 20-minutes late and I had a 39-minute connection in Houston. My legs are still hurting from that mad dash, O.J. Simpson like, through one of the nation’s biggest airports.

What I’ve found on the dozens of flights I’ve taken in the past few months is that quality is not what the airlines seek. Instead, it’s simply quantity and they seem to make no apologies for it. After all, it’s what we asked for.

The watchword for 2009 and 2010 seems to be “transparency.”

While politicians bicker in Washington on just about everything, one item they should agree on is a desire from the public for more disclosure and open dialogue.

This is not a new occurrence. For many decades, the government has been guided by “Sunshine laws,” open door requirements, and outreach processes to allow adequate public participation.

Now, the question can become, does the government actually listen to the public and offer up more than government-speak to curious citizens?

I’ve been on the road facilitating public outreach meetings for a government agency. We’re traveling around the Pacific Northwest and talking with a variety of citizenry about Cold-War legacy, nuclear materials cleanup.

I am convinced these government officials are very genuine in their interests to obtain public input and disclose everything they know about the problem we confront in nuclear waste cleanup.

Why do I believe this? Well, first, they assembled a 6,000 page Environmental Impact Statement that covers more than we’d ever want to know about the problem. Second, they are traveling endless hours — to sometimes remote locations — to garner public input. Third, they developed a wide variety of easy-to-understand fliers, handouts and posters to offer up valid and simple explanations. Lastly, they created CDs of reports, assembled a content rich Web site and other consumer friendly stuff.

All in all, this public involvement process shows me there is a way to offer up full disclosure and develop good discourse on government actions in the name of transparency.

I have to admit, I was a bit shocked to walk into the office cafeteria and see a sizable group huddled around the television this past week. It was 11 a.m. EST, and I had forgotten about Tiger’s faux news conference. Unbelievable, I know.

To be quite frank, I have not seen a group gather at the office TV set like that since Sept. 11.

My first thought was the assemblage consisted of a group of die-hard golfers wanting to see if the “gifted one” was getting back into golf. I would not blame them. Where would we be without the likes of sports icons such as Peyton Manning, Michael Jordan and, yes Tiger Woods?

A quick survey indicated these colleagues were not golfers at all.

Nope, they were only a few of the millions watching with a hell-bent curiosity on what Tiger will say and do next.

The National Enquirer-like fervor that has taken hold of the country since the Buick got bashed is not surprising, however. Entertainment has far eclipsed hard news as a rallying cry for curiosity seekers and those wanting to see others crumble under the harsh light of fame and fortune.

But Tiger cannot be surprised by the intensity of the interest. Or, can he?

Those people who rise to the multi-billion dollar club are, many times, taken aback by the wild interest in their private lives. Tiger said he wants to keep his life private. Good luck at that.

Once he became famous he left the privacy card at the door. Many well-to-do, successful politicians and athletes forget that once they start making money by leveraging their fans or constituents to gain monetary strength, their lives become a fish bowl. No, you cannot go back. Once you sign up your life is as transparent as Glad wrap.

Does this mean there’s a double standard? Does this mean that “Joe Six-Pack” doesn’t get the introspection that Tiger is seeing? Yes, absolutely.

And, to all those people seeking public office or a spot on a professional sports team, just remember these words: “How will that action you took today read above-the-fold in tomorrow’s paper?”

While some PR practitioners may suggest what we do borders on miraculous or mysterious, I offer a more pragmatic viewpoint.

Let’s look at Newton’s third law of motion for answers.

Newton’s third law of motion states that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. I don’t know about you, but I believe it.

Take the current health care debate, for example. The administration proposes one thing: “We need a government option so that all may be insured.” Bam!
Someone else proposes the opposite: “No, what we need is more affordable care, and insurance reform.”

Someone postulates the answer in Afghanistan is troop withdrawal. Then, someone else proposes a surge.

In PR we see Newton’s law work just like your model rocket experiment in senior science class. Just take any old politician: “I did not take money from the lobbyist in question.”
Public reaction: “Oh, yes you did.”

And one of my favorite takes on the laws of thermodynamics stipulates that when you create order in one place, it creates disorder somewhere else.

In PR, this is known as creating a distraction to draw attention away from our client tactic.

Instead of dealing with a catastrophe head-on, a PR ploy is to distract from the central issue. Thus, creating disorder in one place allows you to create order somewhere else.

Don’t you just love these science scenarios? So, the next time someone suggests that you get out the PR crystal ball and call upon the “ghosts of campaigns past” for your solutions, suggest it may be better to head over to the lab and break out the slide rule.

They still make slide rules, don’t they?

One of the toughest things to do well in public relations is to write a relevant, compelling and concise news release.

Why—because much of what we’re asked to write about is not news, or, is old news at best. Worse yet, it may have no news value locally.

News releases are the bane of many reporters: They get them, scan them and toss them. And, it’s not their fault. Generally, news releases are written in passive pabulum and don’t follow several important guidelines.

Instead of me extolling the virtues of how to get a news release used, I will take some sage advice from Bob Zaltsberg, long-time editor at a wonderful local daily in southern Indiana, The Herald-Times (Bloomington, Ind.).

Bob states, “When considering what you’d like to see published, consider these factors: News is something that will be of interest to others. Ask yourself these questions about the event or issue you want us to cover: Why should people care? Would you care if you weren’t involved? Why is it important that people know this information?”

Furthermore, when it comes to “pitching” a story to a reporter, it’s important to consider where the most compelling story may be found. Bob illustrates this point in the following:

“The point is, the fact that your group or organization is sponsoring something or hosting something or organizing something is not as newsworthy as the issue your group is trying to address or the people you are trying to help. “Group X holds bake sale” is not as newsworthy as “Bake sale benefits Boys and Girls Club.” And that’s not as newsworthy as suggesting a story on any significant issue young people who frequent the Boys and Girls Club are facing that could use the attention of the community.”

This is great advice. Thanks Bob.

Quickly, here are a few tips to consider:

1. Is what you are announcing really news? Is there another way to get the message out on less-than-newsworthy items?
2. Write in the active voice and in current time. Most of the releases I see use troubling passive-voice phrases such as, “has announced,” or “was appointed.”
3. Put the most important information up front. Seems simple, but we find many wayward releases with buried leads.
4. Use AP style to be consistent and conform to industry standards.
5. Keep it short and pithy. No one needs more long-winded diatribes consuming their inbox.
6. Write real quotes that sound like someone talking. “I am deeply excited about the awe-inspiring dedication of a large contingency of citizens finding a way to congregate around a cause…” C’mon. No one actually talks like that, unless it’s William F. Buckley.

Another young man strapped with explosives has flown the friendly skies and reminded us that the war on terrorism is still being fought on our own soil.

There is a public relations aspect to terrorism. Literally, extremists want to impact public perceptions and influence decision-making on a grand scale.

Think about the public relations implications of the newest attempt at terror. Why would someone pick Christmas Day? Well, it’s pretty obvious. Christmas is a Christian celebration associated with feelings of world peace and a sense of serenity. His goal was simple: Shatter the calm, introduce doubt and fear, and show the irony of the moment.

Some experts may say the act was done on a day that would have less scrutiny, lax security and unsuspecting citizens.

However, there’s a more troubling, deeper implication behind this pyrotechnical display at 30,000 feet. Terrorists are staying a few steps ahead of us with their diabolical decisions.

First, the day was chosen by the would-be warrior because we have a set of values based upon Western thinking. On Christmas, we are snuggled soundly in our beds with thoughts of sugarplums dancing in our heads. No one would really attack us on Christmas Day, would they? That seems dark and cheap — exactly.

Second, our security experts have long suggested that terrorists want to blow up planes over the ocean to hide evidence. But, they neglect to take into account one key point. The current soldier-of-terror is not concerned with being coy or sly. In fact, the exact opposite is true. In this instance, the goal was to cause as much damage as possible by blowing up a plane over a metropolitan area, on American soil, during one of the major Christian holidays.

Why didn’t our experts think of that? They may want to take a few crash courses in public relations this year.