Jim Parham, PR Chronicle

Annually, I prognosticate public relations and related happenings that have a high degree of certainty of occurring in the upcoming year. Call it wimpy if you’d like, but I like a sure thing. And, unlike the 2011 end-of-world predictions and those for 2012, I’d rather not be the laughing stock of my loyal readers.
So, here we go…

1. The NBA shortened season will be as boring as a regular, full-length season; only this season will be noted with an asterisk that says, “Team won championship, but it’s not that valid because it was an abbreviated season.”
2. There will be claims in the Presidential campaign that the opponent is twisting and distorting the facts in his/her advertising.
3. There may be a claim that Herman Cain fathered several pizza delivery men (or women).
4. There will be a [pick one] illegal drug, illicit sex or gun charges against a player in the NFL.
5. There will be a blinding snow storm on the East Coast that gets a silly name like Snowzilla and some city will claim it was overwhelmed and unprepared.
6. The Weather Channel will brand a “named hurricane” with its own tagline like, “The Big One.”
7. Someone on a reality TV show will check into the Betty Ford Clinic.
8. There will be a “massive recall of [pick one] cars, trucks, SUVs, ground beef, ground turkey or cribs.
9. Someone will make a fashion faux pas on the red carpet at the Grammy Awards.
10. And some politician will claim, “If elected, I will go to Washington, D.C. and change the way it does business.” Right.

Fact is stranger than fiction: Penn State has proven that repeatedly over the past month. The school has gone beyond critical mass and the meltdown has played out in front of tens of millions of sports fans and hundreds of millions of sickened citizens.

The Penn State debacle has all the ingredients of a PR witches brew that has boiled over into other programs, nationwide. The horrific claims alone make this a reputation management nightmare. But then there’s the lack of follow-up and possible cover-up that ensued. In total, there’s enough bad PR to cover the globe in a foot-thick gob of slime.

And, speaking of slime, how can anybody in his right mind agree to an interview with Bob Costas and spew forth incredibly damning sound bites? Where’s the limited access, carefully controlled messaging that goes along with crisis management?

There are no winners in this disaster. Victims are stacking up like cordwood and the University has taken a severe beating on all fronts. Some people have lost their jobs and surely there will be more to come.

Penn State has tried really hard to stay ahead of the crisis from a PR perspective. But, alas, with so many moving parts and an ever-changing landscape, it’s been a very difficult task. Unfortunately, the PR people at Penn State don’t control key players in the crisis or external messaging, and that has proven to be a most challenging part of the PR puzzle.

It is interesting to note that Monday morning quarterbacking occurs not only after football games, but certainly after a crisis.

Our local business journal did an extensive story on how crisis planning would have greatly helped immediately after the recent stage collapse at the Indiana State Fair. Several local public relations gurus weighed in on the subject, and there was a clear sense that crisis planning is almost always needed, but never done.

Well, that’s pretty much accurate. Most companies, nonprofits and government are wildly absent good crisis planning. Most people don’t want to pay for it. But, I think there’s something more to it. In my experience, it appears that many people don’t want to face the facts. In other words, something really bad could happen to you, your business or customer, but you choose to ignore it.

It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to realize that a bona-fide crisis can run the gamut. But rocket scientists do understand that now, but after terrible tragedies in the space shuttle program. NASA learned after Challenger that some things are just inconceivable, but very real. They were caught totally unprepared for the deluge after the disaster.

To prepare for the unimaginable, the unthinkable, the unforeseeable, it takes a hard look internally. Many times, the company or institution is the very last one to be objective and look at possible trouble from a 30,000-foot view. That’s where a detached, PR professional can be of help. I bastardize a term to describe the process of running the ridiculous to the sublime scenarios of a potential crisis: Visioning.

You must step back, explore all the possibilities and not leave a stone unturned. I do always remind clients in the throes of a crisis of this: Fact is stranger than fiction.

Recently a good friend and able competitor closed his public relations operation after many, many successful years. However, things turned south in the past few years and his business waned. Our “Paper of Record” reported on the shift in the PR marketplace, suggesting, “the times they are a changing.”

Well, yes they are.

The article interviewed a lot of pundits who suggested that large agencies are dinosaurs and the new, nimble two-person shop or independent contractor is the new “us.”

Wait a minute. Just because some shops have closed their doors due to a bad economy, misplaced priorities or experiments gone awry, doesn’t mean the larger agency is dead.

Let’s look at some of the realities. Larger shops have the ability to target a lot of resources to an immediate issue or project. If a one-person shop has a migraine…oops! A diverse agency can bring a variety of expertise to the table. The large agency doesn’t have to depend on subcontractors or hard-to-find or hard-to-manage freelancers.

But, wait a minute. What about rates? Actually, while a sole operator has greatly reduced overhead, they have to pay for health insurance, data sets and production by freelancers or specialty shops. The agency on the other hand can churn out product better than butter. The agency has the databases and the internal mechanisms to create and implement campaigns fast.

But something is changing. No longer are clients satisfied with the, “We’ll write up a news release and send it to the newspaper.” Nope. Today, it’s all about the 24-hour news cycle, the blogosphere, the demise of the newspaper and the rise of viral everything. Today, attacks on a client’s reputation come from everywhere and nowhere. It’s clear that agencies have to develop keen skills in all media types, especially social media.

So, to write off the agency as dead is a bit difficult for me. Largeness has a place. Maybe not for the lone entrepreneur needing a quick news release or Op-Ed, but sure-footed and accessible PR resources from a larger entity can handle the really tough stuff.

Democracy – Who said it had to be pretty.
Ok, so there is a lot of bad Ju-Ju out there about our country’s leadership in the executive and legislative branches. Certainly the popularity polls for politicians are dropping like flies encountering a can of full-strength Raid, ® but is it all that bad? Really?

When working toward my graduate degree at American University, I encountered some really wonderful professors and practitioners. Now, as a college teacher, I go back and reflect on a lot of the things learned there.

One of the best lessons learned was from a long-time bureaucrat whose name I forget. But, one day when I was lamenting the state of government and my work for said governmental agency, this adjunct lecturer and seasoned government type looked at me and said: “In a Democracy things are not supposed to be tidy and efficient. It’s through discourse, debate and downright fights do we get it right. It may take awhile, but at the end good government flows forth.”

I though about that for a moment and it did make some sense. Sure, I had been taken aback when traveling to Capital Hill and being told the $2 billion budget we were requesting was going to be $2.5 billion so several pork projects could be constructed. But, there was always rigorous debate and many times an outright fight over some new highway or needless wayside rest stop. But, in the end, most people were well served by both Congress and the Administration.

Today, however, much of the debate is centering on a simple problem. Government is spending more money that it’s taking in. Most of us with a checkbook and credit card know this issue well. However, if we overspend the Repo man cometh, and/or our credit rating number equals our age.

And to counter my college professor’s philosophy, it appears to me that heated debate and rhetoric will do little to make this budget debacle better. After all, it’s really tough to be disciplined when you are the one printing the money. If we did that, we’d end up in jail.

“Where do you want to be in five years?” Sure, that’s a common question you hear in interviews all of the time. And, of course, this one: “What do you consider to be your strengths and oppositely, your weaknesses?” OK, so that’s a sure bet.

But, what are the things that can derail your interview chances faster than the rise of gold prices? Well, here are a few that may prove to be ones to avoid. I’m not saying I have all the right ones, just the ones I think stand out.

1. Mispronouncing the name of the company or the person doing the interview. I hear this all the time from potential employees during the interview process. Really? You cannot figure out how to say the company’s name, which at our firm is the owner’s name.

2. Answering the Question of, “Why do you want to be in public relations?” with the following response: “Gee, I don’t know, I guess I like to work with people.” Ok, so become a greeter at Wal-Mart if that’s what you desire. Public relations involves people, but it isn’t an ice cream social.

3. Having done no research on the company, you don’t realize they just had a major re-organization or announcement. Do your homework. Learn about the company, non-profit or government agency. Research and figure out what makes them tick and the latest major news come forth from the entity.

4. Using slang. I recently counted the number of “Likes” in a presentation by an intern to a client. 42 “Likes” in 10 minutes. Wow. Like, that is, like crazy.

5. Not asking “smart questions” of the interviewer. Trust me on this one. Potential employers like to be challenged with great questions. It will impress. If you notice a major shift in the company’s online presence, ask why? That will certainly get their attention.

You only get a small snippet of time to impress potential employers and wow them with your smarts, eagerness and flexibility. Remember that straight talk, honesty and directness win a lot of favors with those who hear reams of BS on a daily basis. Let’s call it refreshing, like, OK?

Switching gears for dyed-in-the-wool public relations practitioners from hard-copy news releases sent out snail mail to instant Twitter posts is a tough transition.

The bread and butter of PR used to be news releases and follow up pitches. Sure, it’s still in the toolbox, but many of these missives end up in ghost town news rooms or on the desks of overworked, general assignment reporters.

Gone are the days of print beat reporters working for days on an in-depth story. It’s now instant posting of stories on the website while still sitting in public meetings or covering an accident…complete with video.

Those of us in PR realize that a reputation damaging tweet can do as much harm as an above-the-fold story in today’s newspaper.

If you stay with what you know and practice in PR, there’s a great chance that you’ll become irrelevant. Today’s internet is more pervasive, more powerful than any medium ever created. It’s instantaneous, unfiltered and high-biased content spills out in billions of megabytes daily, largely unchallenged and certainly absent fact checking.

PR practitioners must keep up with the times by leaving comfort behind and spending a large chunk of time online seeing what’s trending today and what blog posts are taking direct aim at their clients.

Reporters are reading the comments and posts as well, picking up tips, rumors and possible chinks in your armor.

We now live by Google alerts and 140 characters instead of clip books and reams of releases. And, really it seems like a good trend.

Low-hanging fruit is an easy target and a crisis manager’s nightmare.

Welcome to the world of Charlie Sheen.

Rarely do we see such a public detonation of a Hollywood star as we’ve witnessed in recent weeks with the implosion of America’s bad boy of sitcom. There are the alleged drugs, sex and, well, a lot of drugs and sex, maybe.

Where is Charlie’s “handler”? Where is his public relations guru perched upon his shoulder, his message manager? Clearly, there isn’t one. Well, maybe it’s his long-time sidekick manager who is as “zany” as Charlie himself.

Oh yes, there was a publicist, but he quit and then Charlie fired him. That fits perfectly.

But, for all intents and purposes, Charlie Sheen appears to be handling his own crisis now. The word “handling” sort of sticks in my throat, however. When stars, political types and company CEO’s egos become bigger than boulders, they feel invincible and will “set the world straight.” No need for a personal crisis manager.

Someone caught in the crosshairs of controversy is probably the least likely person to think straight, act rationally and handle their own external communication.

Hence, if you are embroiled in deep doo-doo, you ought to hire a communication consultant. Yes, this is self-serving. Those of us who make a living in crisis communication know that clients don’t like to write checks to someone who plays devil’s advocate or dishes out the straight skinny on the issues at hand.

After all, the client usually knows better. Yeah, right.

But, those of us in crisis communication do as umpires do: “Call them as you see them.” We are the ones who separate fact from fiction, talk about perception equaling reality and develop sound responses to those oft-asked embarrassing questions.

Sure, it costs some money to hire a communication consultant, but it might avoid re-titling your former show “One and a Half Men.”

OK, so I’m going against the grain here. But, there is a common misconception that has grown like mold spores on the well-forgotten summer sausage in the back of my refrigerator.

In theory, young people seeking their first, post-college job (or even internship) should stick to a one-page resume.

This dictum comes from just about every college adviser or placement counselor. You can here it now, “Well, Johnny, you have extensive experience and some wonderful references, but remember it must be one page, so you need to cut something.”

Oh, contraire!

Let’s be frank. While many young adults struggle to fill one 8.5 inch by 11 inch, there are significant numbers of folks who can, and should, forget the one-page theorem and take as much space as necessary.

Here’s my advice, and after hiring hundreds of public relations practitioners, I think it’s sound: Take as much space as necessary to accurately and adequately, TELL YOUR STORY.

If the information runs onto page two, don’t freak out; just make sure there is actual punch, not puffery in your prose.

Here are some tips from someone who actually does the hiring:

1. Make sure you give an address, phone number and e-mail you will actually answer or read. Many times students list their parent’s house or their recently disconnected phone numbers.
2. List some classes on your resume and tell what the class entailed. For example, Public Relations Writing: Developed 14 deliverables ranging from press releases and fact sheets to speeches and public service announcements.
3. Tell us what it is you actually did in your summer internship. Bad: Assisted large advertising agency with various tasks. Good: Developed social media component, including Facebook and Twitter for viral, reputation management campaign.
4. Give references, not references upon request. Why are you shy about giving some names of people who will vouch for you? List them; the employer might even know them.